When a parent or grandparent is diagnosed with dementia, life can begin to change for the whole family. Familiar routines may become difficult, conversations may be repeated, and someone who was once fiercely independent may increasingly rely on others for support.
For family members, helping a loved one with dementia is an act of care, patience and deep love. It can also be physically tiring, emotionally confronting and financially complicated. No family should feel that they have to navigate this journey alone. Professional aged care, medical, legal and financial advice can provide valuable guidance at every stage.
Focus on the person, not only the diagnosis
A person living with dementia remains the same parent, grandparent, partner or friend they have always been. They still deserve dignity, respect, companionship and a sense of belonging.
Rather than focusing on what has been lost, families can look for ways to maintain connection. Sharing photographs, playing favourite music, preparing familiar meals or taking a gentle walk may provide comfort. Even when someone cannot remember every detail of a visit, the feeling of being safe and loved can remain.
Communication may need to become slower and simpler. Allow extra time for responses, avoid arguing over minor details and offer choices that are easy to understand. A calm voice and reassuring presence can often be more important than finding the perfect words.
Share the responsibility
Caring responsibilities can gradually fall onto one person, often without the family formally discussing it. This can lead to exhaustion, resentment or caregiver burnout.
Families should talk openly about how responsibilities can be shared. One person might attend medical appointments, another may manage shopping and meals, while someone else handles paperwork or provides regular companionship. Family members who live further away may still contribute by making phone calls, researching services or helping financially.
Respite care and community support services can also give carers an essential opportunity to rest. Accepting help is not a sign that the family is failing. It is often what allows loving care to continue sustainably.
Plan early where possible
Dementia can affect a person’s ability to understand information and make decisions. This makes early planning particularly important.
While the person can still communicate their wishes, families may need to discuss enduring powers of attorney, substitute decision-making arrangements, advance care planning and preferences for future accommodation and medical care. These conversations can be uncomfortable, but they may prevent confusion and family disagreements later.
Estate planning should also be reviewed. A qualified solicitor can help ensure that a will remains appropriate and that the correct legal documents are in place. Families should avoid making assumptions about who can legally access accounts, sell property or make decisions on another person’s behalf.
Understand the financial and aged care choices
The cost and structure of aged care can be complex. Options may include support within the family home, home care services, respite care or permanent residential care.
Before making major decisions, seek advice from an aged care financial specialist, financial adviser, accountant or solicitor with relevant experience. Advice may be required about the family home, fees, income, investments, superannuation, pensions and the ongoing needs of a spouse or other dependent.
Decisions made in a rush can have long-term consequences. Good advice can help families understand their choices while keeping the wellbeing of their loved one at the centre of the discussion.
Remember to care for the carer
Supporting someone with dementia can bring grief, frustration, guilt and sadness, alongside moments of humour, affection and gratitude. Carers need permission to acknowledge their own feelings and protect their health.
Stay connected with friends, accept practical assistance and speak with a doctor or counsellor when the emotional load becomes difficult. Support groups can also provide reassurance from people who understand the experience.
There may be no perfect way to navigate dementia. What matters most is approaching each stage with compassion, patience and respect. With family cooperation and quality professional advice, it is possible to protect a loved one’s dignity while creating a safer and more supported future for everyone involved.
This article provides general information only and does not constitute medical, legal, financial or aged care advice. Families should seek advice suited to their individual circumstances.
If this article has inspired you to think about your unique situation and, more importantly, what you and your family are going through right now, please get in touch with your advice professional.
This information does not consider any person’s objectives, financial situation, or needs. Before making a decision, you should consider whether it is appropriate in light of your particular objectives, financial situation, or needs.
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Disclaimer: The information contained in this article is general in nature and does not take into account your personal objectives, financial situation or needs. Please consider whether the information is appropriate to your circumstance before acting on it and, where appropriate, seek professional advice.